Assertiveness

Are you assertive or non assertive? Do you use aggressive behaviour?

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Further pages to be added. Please see the Subject search at bottom of page.

In this section we intend to be assertive with you.

Introduction

Assertiveness is a commonly used word that often means different things to different people - for instance it carries overtones of being 'pushy' to some people. However, in personal development circles it is one of the groups of behaviour labelled Interpersonal Skills, and has a very specific meaning.

Assertiveness training and material is equally suitable for those exhibiting non assertive or aggressive behaviour. However those who are not assertive frequently wish to change their behaviour whilst those who use aggressive behaviour often either do not recognise it, or do not see the need to change.

A change of behaviour will only occur if people want to change.

What Assertiveness is and the benefits.

  • By behaving in an assertive manner individuals will foster good working relationships and promote effective communication.
  • People will be more creative, positive and effective.
  • Organisations will benefit because people will work better together and be more flexible.
  • Being assertive means being honest with yourself and others but not at the expense of others.
Assertiveness is not about getting your own way and winning every time. It is about being clear about your views and needs but also being able to see the other person's point of view and reaching the best possible agreement for all concerned.

Definitions:
    Assertive:
  • a direct honest and respectful style of interacting with others expressing needs, wants, opinions feelings and beliefs appropriately
  • standing up for your own rights without taking away the rights of the other person
  • aims to satisfy the needs and wants of both parties involved in a situation
  

    Non Assertive:
  • a passive and indirect style of behaviour
  • allows the wants, needs and feelings of others to be more important than your own
  • fails to stand up for yourself and often communicates a message of inferiority
  • aims to avoid conflict by pleasing others
    Aggressive:
  • aggressive behaviour is a style that implies your needs, wants and opinions are more important than other people's
  • it can take the form of sarcasm, humour at someone's else's expense, blaming, patronising, ignoring and dismissive attitude as well as outright personalised attacks
  • you stand up for yourself but communicate a message of superiority
  • aggressive behaviour aims to win at any cost
We will be adding a number of articles over the coming months.

In the meantime we are offering you the opportunity to search our database for any relevant articles on Assertiveness.

All you need to do is to click on the Start Search button. There is no need to enter any text! However you can refine your search by adding a word or short phrase in the text box first. It is your choice.

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For information on CD's and audio books that may be of use please click here: Self Development CD's and audio books.You could also try some of the sections that deal with particular aspects of communication. For example Communication (General) or Interpersonal Skills.

In the article Emotional Intelligence you can read more about why your soft skills are important and how you can become more aware of these skills. In the article Self Development with Theory X and Theory Y we highlight the importance of communication in the workplace.

To read further - books on assertiveness.

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